Joy in the Journey

God's grace has rocked this life. I've been doing a lot of reflecting
over the past few weeks--something I never did much of in earlier years.
But it's been so amazing to see the impossibly beautiful path God has
led me through up to this very point. Maybe this is "Till We Have Faces"
theology--maybe it's all experience. But I don't see a problem with
that. Each of us has his own story. That's the way God made us. He's not
just the God of the Bible--He's the God of today. And what's more, He
wants us to learn from today as well as the Bible. So looking back, I
see all the baggage I accumulated, all the times Satan thought he had
the victory in my life. I see it's all been a process, a beautiful
process (I'm on a beauty kick if you couldn't already tell. I hope it
lasts.) that has been painful, but also perfect. I tried to liken it to
this metaphor a while back: I was this deep-rooted, mud-covered,
thick-barked, stump that God effortlessly pulled from the ground and
said to it, "I'm going to make something out of you for My pleasure."
The soothing part was the cleaning. It felt good. That lasted for about
a year. Then God started working on that bark. That was the painful
part. He's been peeling it off for the past 3 years. And now He's come
to this point--where He's ready to start widdling away. But I think
that's a terrible metaphor since I'm not in the least bit a poetic soul.
So I'm assuming that it just won't make sense to the rest of the world.
However, that's the best I can do right now. Right now I'm at the point
where it's hard for me not praise God for the impossible circumstances
that have taken place in my life. It's all been connected. Kind of
reminds me "Signs"--"Everything happens for a reason." It's something we
can't get away from as good Christians. But do we really believe it?
That, our lives are part of this web of interrelated events each
specifically planned out by God with his or her needs in mind. I am
convinced that everything does happen for a reason. Even the minutest of
events--such as me going to a Nickel Creek concert which led to Sara
Watkins staring at me which led to an unhealthy obsession for a stupid
band which led to me wasting $300 on a trip to see my friends in
Greenville which led to me coming to the end of myself on the 11 hour
drive home which led to a whole slew of other events. And the thing is,
the chain starts way before that and ends way beyond that and continues
to this day. That's part of the "wonder and wildness to life." Us seeing
our needs met in the most absurd of ways. It has most undoubtedly shed a
whole new light on my walk--past, present, and future. The promise of
God that the very hairs on my head are numbered is real for me. He is
working in my life, personally--and it's for my good, and He will keep
working until it reaches its perfect consummation. I cling to this
promise.